A few days ago, I read a really nice blog post by another critical care nurse about how we carry our patients with us...
and it resonated.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sonja-mitrevskaschwartzbach-bsn-rn-ccrn/letter-to-patients_b_9034024.html

I've always thought of this relationship we have with our patients and families as something really profound; that our interactions change us, in ways we often could not have anticipated, but would never (or at least for me) would  avoid even when incredibly painful in the moment.

I've written  a lot over the years for myself in exploration and expiation:  poetry, short stories, short essays. I've written a plethora of policies and procedures to help others render care safely and according to specific standards of care. I have read and and been informed by extraordinarily erudite and lovely writers like Lewis Thomas, Richard Selzer, and most especially Oliver Sacks, who taught me just how much our experiences with patients require compassion and incisive thinking, both.

My metaphor is this....of course I carry you all with me..you've tattooed yourselves upon my soul.